No I’m not a stepmom. But I have one. Not a Cinderella type stepmom. But an incredibly amazing one who entered my life when I was 2 years old, and is an intricate part of all my childhood memories.
Maybe you are a stepmom reading this or maybe, like me, you have a stepmom in your life. I personally think the “stepmoms” get a bad wrap, especially in a lot of films, they seem to be vilified. When in fact, most stepmoms are really brave and should be seen as more of a “bonus mom”.
I think we can all agree motherhood is not an easy role. There is no salary or promotions or paid time off. There is no individually catered manual on how to raise the perfect little human beings. Of course, the rewards and joy our mini-mes bring into our lives do out weigh the day-to-day exhaustion and stress; but being a mother is not for the weak of heart.
That being said, it is hard for me to imagine stepping into a “mother” role, investing time and energy into helping raise a child or children but not technically being celebrated the “same” on Mother’s Day.
With Mother’s Day approaching, and the extra time during quarantine to think about the truly important things in life like my relationships, as well as being a mother of two myself, I have been putting a lot of thought into what it would mean to be “stepmother”. It is especially heavy on my heart as of late, since I do not currently have a relationship with my own biological mother after a long tumultuous past.
I wonder if my sweet stepmom felt awkward every Mother’s Day because she was essentially a mother in every way, shape and form besides the biological component and therefore didn’t seem to get the same “credit”. Did she feel “second best” or not “as appreciated” even with the homemade cards or gifts? Honestly, I don’t remember her reactions or how much effort I put into Mother’s Day for my stepmom, but as an adult I do remember how much I truly appreciated her love and absolutely adored her like a mother.
So as an ode to her this Mother’s Day, I’m gonna tell you exactly why I absolutely believe stepmothers deserve to be celebrated on Mother’s Day as well.
Why Stepmothers Should Be Celebrated
Celebrating a stepparent on a holiday such as Mother’s Day or Father’s Day can be difficult for some children. They can feel disloyal to their own mother or father if they also celebrate their stepmom or stepdad; especially if there is any resentment in the family.
We need to remember Mother’s Day can be an emotional day for stepmoms; especially stepmoms who have jumped feet first into a motherly role for their stepchildren and love them like their own. In reality, stepmoms are most likely helping to create or pick out the Mother’s Day gifts for the biological mother. It seems unfair at times, the biological mother gets all the praise or appreciation, whether they deserve it or not.
As I mentioned at the beginning, I am not a stepmom. But I know what a incredible stepmom is like and I know those ones deserve the same appreciation and love on Mother’s Day as biological mothers. Just a simple acknowledgement, gesture, handmade card or flowers will go a long way and show them they are loved and appreciated.
For the stepmothers who aren’t being recognized by their stepchildren on Mother’s Day, this stepchild recognizes you and wants you to understand you are celebrated! You are important, appreciated and doing the best job any REAL mother can do! The stepmother life didn’t choose you…YOU choose the stepmother life. And that’s some real badass shit! Do you have any other thoughts on why stepmothers should be celebrated on Mother’s Day? Let me know in a comment below!
Pin this post for later!
